Bombing Big and Trying Again

I can tell something is on my mind if I continually bring it up in conversation with different people. Although there's less of a sting present than there was earlier in the week, I still think it'd be therapeutic for me to address it here.

As part of my teaching assignment this year, I teach four classes virtually, for a total of 10 periods. All of these are primary division students. Teaching younger students online is a different kettle of fish from what I did last year, when I pivoted with my Grade 5-6 students back and forth from in-person to online. The younger students aren't as independent as their older counterparts. I notice that for some students, they find it difficult to complete certain tasks that traditionally I would have accomplished easily with pencil and paper. Assignments take much longer to complete, and it isn't clear how much home assistance the students receive. I decided to set up one-on-one interviews with the students so that they could demonstrate their understanding orally, eliminating the issue of managing online documents.

Tangent: I have learned now to clarify whether or not I want solutions or just a listening ear when I describe situations. For the purpose of this post, this is just a vent, and that's why I am not explaining exactly all the tech steps I used.

I couldn't find a Creative Commons visual to illustrate this idea effectively, so I turned to imgflip.com to create a meme. Back to the original story ... 

I set up my small group areas in advance, knowing that it was probably going to be a bit challenging to establish. Thankfully, the virtual team has already attempted something similar with a whole-school event, so I hoped that the prior experience would help ease the transition.

The lesson bombed, big-time. Students couldn't access the area. I removed what I thought was the barrier and tried again. Students still couldn't get where they needed to go. I sent links to various spots. No luck. I actually ran to fetch their regular classroom teacher (who was on her prep) to see if she could advise me. I didn't have the set-up on my computer to mimic what she does for small group work. I set up my personal computer as a second source, but that failed too. This was all happening as nearly twenty students were right in front of me. I felt terrible. Then I heard something that made me feel even worse. I heard a negative comment from a grown-up in the background, criticizing what I was doing.

I addressed the "unseen adults in the background", apologizing for all the snags, but also explaining that teachers aren't trained on how to conduct online classes, so we are all learning as we go and there are bound to be stumbles. 

I'll admit - it hurt.

Thankfully, the colleagues I spoke to were kind and helpful. Thanks Maha, Renee, Jen BC, and others who consoled me and (because I was ready to hear it at that point) offered advice and technology work-arounds. I tried again the next time I saw them and my set-up worked. The only new wrinkle is that I had anticipated conducting 4 interviews per single period, and I'm only completing 1 per period. It looks like I am going to have to use my personal prep time (which lately has been used for sanitizing manipulatives in the library, shelving books, and organizing the 1:1 device roll-out program) to go back on line and conduct more interviews so I can have a chance of completing them sooner. 

So, what's my "lesson learned"? Maybe it's a combination of "if at first you don't succeed, try, try again", "you can't please all the people all the time" and "be gentle with yourself". 

pic.twitter.com/qjgy5ohwpy

— Laura McFarren (@lauramcfarren) October 10, 2021